Dear husband
I saw you yesterday and I know you saw me too, but you just passed me as if you hadn’t. I shouted your name really loud but you just kept walking as if I wasn’t there. Was my voice not loud enough and did you not see my smile?
Even when I walked into the house too, you behaved still with scorn. The way you looked at me and smirked your face made me cry. I could not show you though the tears in my eyes because then you could see the defeat I felt that very moment. Instead when I went to the bathroom I just laid in there and I cried. I cry a million times but I just never show you.
I don’t know where it all went wrong that you treat me worse than my own fears. I gave you the beauty of my youth and I gave you all my essence of being a woman. I gave birth to our 3 beautiful children but all I have now is scars that will never fade away.
I went to the doctor yesterday too and when he asked me about the bruises all over my body I just said I was clumsy and fell down the stairs, one time too many. You know every time you raise your hand at me, you take away a piece of my soul. I think I am just an empty shell of a person without a soul considering the number of times you have hit on me and pushed me against the wall. I see the specks of my blood on the wall when I am going up the staircase and no matter how much I wash the walls even with bleach the spots just don’t fade at all.
This house which we bought to call a home is a prison for me. No matter how much heating I put on its still cold for me. I shiver every time I walk through the door even in summer when it is hot outside. My heart pounds really hard, this was meant to be a safe place for me and you know my history.
You know how when I was a young girl that man who was meant to be my guardian abused me and my mama just looked on. You know I was hooked onto drugs and thrown into soliciting just to survive. You know the streets were rough on me. The ghetto corrupted me. You know my life almost ended when I cut my wrists one time too many and I lost so much blood out there on the streets before they found me. You know too how hard it was to have a child because of the abortion I had after the rape when I was 12. My husband you came and you promised me it was all going to be fine.
I got off the streets into this amazing building which was meant to be my security place and here you are today worse than anything I had never imagined.
Please my husband just don’t hit me anymore or raise your hand at me. I am at the point of losing my mind and I am afraid I might lift these tiny worn out hands and take you out. Please I beg you don’t let my children grow without their parents, because I know I will snap one day.
I hope you will read this letter after your dinner and reply me in the morning.
Your wife
This just made me cry!
This just made me cry!
The sad thing is that it real for some woman.
The sad thing is that it real for some woman.