day 29: farewell to my ex-husband

Farewell to my ex-husband

We bade you farewell today, I do not know if you could see us from above. It was such a sobering moment seeing you lying so still and knowing yours was a life cut too short. You were taken away so quick and my boys still do not understand why they saw you lying in such a small space.

I prayed and prayed that your end would be better than it was, dying so alone without anyone to hold you and give you assurance. You were a shadow of the man that you once were. Life is funny, we spend most of it in pursuit of riches and satisfying our carnality and fleshly desires but in the end we are just dust that is blown away by the wind. Money, fame and riches without inward substance are nothing. It did not buy you more years; neither did it bring you good friends nor the fulfilment of that happiness you were in pursuit of.

You made my life a living hell, you took the love that I had for you and you trampled upon it and you did all you could to make sure I was not good enough, but still I am sending you to the heavens with forgiveness.  You made bad decisions which I do not blame you. I read the bible while I wanted to say a eulogy for you and I came across a verse that says people perish because of ignorance. Had you been wiser you would have pursued happiness in a different manner. It says seek first the kingdom of God and all his righteous and everything else shall be added unto you. It is sad Chris that at a young age you have left our three children.

I will raise them the best way I can with the help of the Lord above, he will be their bridge over troubled waters. He shall and will be the one that calms the winds for them. It is said and I know that Jehovah is a father to the fatherless, he is a husband to the widows and he is our everything.

May your soul find the peace and rest in the heavens that you so searched for as you walked these sands. May the doves bring you peace

 

From your ex-wife

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